In response to several questions about the VD cards:

How long have you been offering VD cards?

This is the fifth year. In 2001, my then-flatmate Dave and I created a bunch of cynical cards to send to our friends, with slogans like “Destined to die alone and unloved in a room heavy with the tang of cat wee” and “Oh my god. Thirty and still single.” They were just downloads, really, but we had fun making them.

The next year, we did it again, only this time we added an automatic send function - a free thing, supported by ads. Not great, but about the limits of our technical knowledge at the time. We were surprised how popular they were - a couple of thousand sent!

In 2003, we redesigned and ran the site again, this time with an ad-free back end. Over a two week period, more than 30,000 cards were sent. Last year, the total grew again, to nearly 100K. This year, so far, we’re on track to break another site record, and it’s only just the start of February.

What inspired your anti-Valentine’s Day sentiments?

Basically, I’m not anti-love or anti-romance. I’m against anyone with a vested interest telling us how and when it’s appropriate to celebrate being in love.

I hate all those cutesy bears holding satin hearts saying “I wuv oo snugglebum!” - as if love can only be this childish, simple, pukey thing. I hate the fact that flowers which are reasonably priced at any other time of the year suddenly rocket in price in February, only to plummet again afterwards. It’s like the coporations are saying “yeah, we’re clearly ripping you off, but you have no choice but to accept it.” And I hate the cards with saccharine, pre-written messages and poems. If you love someone as an individual, why would you give them a generic message of love - “I love you in exactly the way that the card company says I should”?

One of the things I hate the most, though, is the pressure to be coupled off at that particular time of year - or, in fact, at all. Some societies have a big problem with the lone individual. Most people see it as a binary state - rather like the weather in England through the winter: it’s either raining, or it’s about to rain. Well, being single is a lot more than just “waiting for a relationship”/”suspect because you’ve chosen to be single” and people shouldn’t be made to feel bad just because their not bumping nasties with someone - anyone. You don’t have to be in a relationship to be a valuable member of society - but they sure as hell make more money off you when you are…

I read on your blog that you’re married – isn’t that a contradiction of the Anti Valentine spirit?

I’m married now, but I was single when the site first launched. But loathing VD isn’t about being single. I know plenty of people - married, single, coupled, gay straight and otherwise - who are sick of the prescriptiveness of the day: being told how to celebrate, and being made to feel cheap/a failure/bad if they don’t do the chocolate/flowers/dinner routine, on exactly the right day.

What’s better - a partner who is a thoughtless pig all year round but manages to sort out hearts and flowers on the fourteenth of February every year, like clockwork, or someone who does nothing spectacular and flashy in the middle of February but sends flowers on a random Wednesday morning, because he was thinking about you, writes little personal messages on post-it notes and hides them in the book you’re reading on the commute to work, and uses his own words, which may not rhyme, but mean more than any stuffed bear could ever manage?

What’s your personal favorite of the bunch?

This year, given that I got married last March, it should probably be the wedding one - though to be fair, I’ve been careful not to yap on about it quite as much as I could have, because I know from years of personal experience that other people’s weddings, babies and holidays are usually pretty boring to anyone who doesn’t have to care.

My favourite card, though, is the one that says “I love you blah blah blah hearts & flowers yadda yadda yadda cupid etc.” because that’s exactly what I see whenever I see those store-bought cards with flowery messages on - “to someone special!”

The most frequently sent card is “Fat. Naked. Dangerous.” closely followed by “Sorry…”