Location:
Hammersmith Bus Station, Tuesday morning

Wearer:
Late teens, perhaps early twenties, male. Stubbly beard (style, not lack of hygiene, I think) and mussy hair. Medium height, pretty muscular

The T-Shirt:
Black with a red St George cross across the front, and grunge style lettering, proclaiming Eat Sleep Breath ENGLAND [sic]

Location:
Barnes High Street, Sunday afternoon

Wearer:
Skinny, tall male, possibly gay or at very least Metrosexual. Late twenties, carrying multiple bags of designer goods (or at least designer bags). Low-slung baggy jeans, flip-flops, studded belt, streaked hair at an unusual angle. Accompanied by two apparent clones (one male, one female)

The T-Shirt:
Lemon yellow, with large silver studs spelling out across the chest the words FUCK YOU. Waiting at the bus stop, with grannies and small children staring, he crossed his arms uncomfortably across the words.

Location:
The Lanes, Brighton, Saturday afternoon

Wearer:
Male, late forties, heavy beard and straggly long hair. Round glasses and Terry-Pratchett-style leather hat despite the sun. Black jeans and boots. Somewhat heavyset. Carrying several bags from a bookshop, plus a green satchel, which bounced on his rear hip as he walked.

The T-Shirt:
Navy blue with plain white lettering across the chest, saying DIP ME IN HONEY AND THROW ME TO THE LESBIANS