Pretty much everyone I know is reproducing at the moment.

In the last three weeks, three friends have given birth (and, I found out last night, a fourth, long-lost friend has done likewise) and two have announced they’re expecting.

A few years ago, everyone was getting married. Now everyone’s spawning left, right and centre. I now have more female friends who are mothers or expectant mothers than not.

And to be honest, it’s all a bit weird.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not anti-kids or anti-pregnancy at all - one day I hope to be part of that happy club - but that’s exactly what it is: a club.

There’s a whole series of rituals and sensations and topics of conversation that you are excluded from if you’re not, or haven’t been up the duff. Yes, you can have opinions. No, they’re not valid.

Motherhood is the trump card when discussing politics, tax returns, education, diet, entertainment, stress, sleep and the environment. Despite being a fully functioning member of society, all my opinions on these subjects are merely theoretical. A parent can trump the lot, simply by bringing life into the world.

This ramble isn’t going anywhere in particular. I’ve just noticed, is all.