Nov 13, 2000
Fable
“The beasts of the forest agreed to put on a splendid entertainment. As usual, at the first opportunity, the Monkey stood up and danced a paso doble, juggling raw fish and grapes. Having vastly delighted the assembly, he sat down amidst universal applause and showers of floral tributes, some of which were still planted. The Fox then took his turn, backflipping across the stage with superb grace, while whistling his own accompaniment. The audience responded with applause which deafened the assembled throng and frightened the birds out of nearby trees. Then the Badger stood up slowly, for he was very old, and recited an epic poem while tap-dancing on a watermelon. Again, the applause was rapturous. Even the frog took a turn, standing on a shoebox and puffing his cheeks out so hard that he turned purple. He, too, left the stage to great whoops and whistles of delight. The Gnu, envious of the praises bestowed on the Monkey, Fox, Badger and Frog and desiring to divert to himself the favor of the guests, proposed to stand up in his turn and dance for their amusement, reciting from great works while playing a zither and making an spinach omelette. He stumbled about the stage in so utterly ridiculous a manner and with such little grace that the Beasts, in a fit of indignation, set upon him with spiked clubs, broke three of his four legs and one rib, tweaked his nose viciously and drove him out of the assembly, shouting wild and unfounded accusations about his sexual performance. And the moral of the story? Always take a spiked club to a performance. You never know how bad the show might be”
Chipshop’s Fables
